Friday, November 17, 2006

blah blah blah

another day closing. i'm so sick of it already. middle tomorrow then sat n sun nite closing. gosh i need my freaking weekend nites free. this month's schedule is really killing me. This month is a busy month for me plus i need to survey the cooleges of interest this month. I hate crossroads, hate decisions,dilemmas...ARGH!!! i want to run away n wish i got a fortune ball so i can see the future. I have been back n forward with my decisions,weighing the pros n cons but just dun have the guts to choose n just do it. i'm tired physically n mentally. i need a break or i'll snap n have another breakdown. I have endless thoughts in my head-work,study,plans,money..etc etc..i don;t want to grow so fast. i wish my study route is just laid out for me n i wanna be those college studetns with time to go out for heaven's sake. I wanna watch a movie also difficult have to make sure i'm free. my bf is free or not. Damn lots of adjustments! y cant life be a lil' bit simpler? i wish i have a job with fixed time. So i can plan out things nicely. i'm a planner. I'm not so much of spontaneous person n i so hate if things screw up but planning is easy..people n execution is tough!! Why did get myself to this level? I've been planning but after form 6 route for so long..guess i was foolish to think things will fall into place so smoothly. i wish i can rewind back time n not accepted the promotion. i love my job now but the timing is right for now. Damn!! too much commitment to sbux now that i cudn't be apart form it. there's many thing sto learn that i'm interested about..the business part of it but if i don't study it'll be too late. If one day got more than 24 hours..i'm so confident i can do both study n work..So tired...tired of planning,tired of wandering...tired of decisions...

No comments: